I oftentimes wonder why people stay in relationships that are clearly not going anywhere.   And yes, I know that there are several reasons people give as to why … like  “he/she is my soul-mate, I’m in love, the fear of being alone, the fear of starting over again, he/she pays the bills, he’s the father of my child.”  Perhaps some even stay because of guilt.  The problem here is that none of these are legitimate reasons to stay in a dead-end relationship.

Definition Time

Dead-End:   A point beyond which no movement or progress can be made.

Relationship: The way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected.

So, watch this …  A Dead-End Relationship is when there is no progress and no movement for two people who are trying  to relate to each other but they can’t because they’re on two different ships!

Did you get that?   How are you going to relate if you are on two different ships with different missions and different purposes?   Yes, there can be a general interest but that doesn’t qualify the person.   If you have no idea who I am and you don’t value my assignment and instead of encouraging me, all you do is find fault – as far as I’m concerned, you don’t qualify to be on my ship.   I’m sorry to disappoint you – but we don’t relate.   I may have your baby – but we don’t relate.  You may have paid my bills in the past – but we don’t relate.  I may have invested the last 5 years of my life with you – but we don’t relate.   Watch this one … We may have even signed our names on the mortgage of a house we were going to live in – but we don’t relate.

Right now, I’m here to challenge your thinking.   Here are a few questions. I need you to hit the PAUSE BUTTON and not only consider but honestly answer each of the following questions …

1)      Is this really what you want?

2)      Are you willing to sacrifice you happiness for arguments and insecurities for the rest of your life?

3)      Is being with this person worth more than you getting your education, pursuing your purpose, starting your business?

Someone might say, well we have the same interest and he/she can help me get my career off the ground.  Listen my friend, even if that is the case, that doesn’t qualify that person to be your lover or your potential spouse!  Take it for what it is.   See them as a business partners or coaches – nothing more and nothing less.

Jesus came to give you abundance of life.  He came so that you could live a fulfilled purpose-driven life.   He didn’t come so that you could stay miserable or be miserable.  I said “or be miserable” because some of you were fine until you invited this person into your life and heart.

So, the ball is in your court.   The Bible says to STANDFAST in your liberty (freedom) and don’t let anything put you back in bondage again.    General interests are fine.  That’s a good thing but make sure you’re hearing from God and that you’re with a person who respects you, honors you and is truly into you.

Rickey E. Macklin  

“Preparing You To Live Victorious!”

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